Tons of Yo Mamma Jokes

---

Yo mama's so fat, I had to take a train and two busses just to get on her
good side.
Yo mama's so fat, when she hauls ass, she has to make two trips.
Yo mama's so fat, when she hauls ass, she has friends come help.
Yo mama's so fat, I've got to tell two snaps just to cover her fat ass.
Yo mama's so fat, she's 36-24-36... but that's her forearm, neck, and
thigh!
Yo mama's so fat, she's 36-24-36... but that's in feet.
Yo mama's so fat, they had to grease a door frame and hold a Twinkie on the
other side to get her through.
Yo mama's so fat, she can lay down and stand up and her height doesn't
change.
Yo mama's so fat, when she dances, she makes the band skip.
Yo mama's so fat, when she walks across the living room, the radio skips.

Yo mama's so fat, when she played hide-n-go-seek, she hid behind a water
tower.
Yo mama's so fat, the horse on her Polo shirt is real.
Yo mama's so fat, the horse on her Jordache jeans is real.
Yo mama's so fat, she's not kidding when she says "I'm so hungry I could
eat a horse!"
Yo mama's so fat, on Halloween she says "Trick or meatloaf!"
Yo mama's so fat, on Halloween she trick or treats two houses at a time.
Yo mama's so fat, when she opens the refrigerator, it says "I give up!"
Yo mama's so fat, when she opens the refrigerator, it says "Uncle!"
Yo mama's so fat, Fat Albert gave her the rights to say "Hey, hey, hey!"
Yo mama's so fat, when she ordered a "My Size Meal" at McDonald's they gave
her a dinosaur.
Yo mama's so fat, when she ordered a "My Size Meal" at McDonald's they gave
her the key to the store.
Yo mama's so fat, when she went to Burger King and asked for a Whopper,
they gave her the sign.
Yo mama's so fat, when she works at the movie theater, she works as the
screen.
Yo mama's so fat, when she runs she makes the CD player skip... at the
radio station.
Yo mama's so fat, her belly jiggle is the first ever perpetual motion
machine.
Yo mama's so fat, all the restaurants in town have signs that say:
"Maximum Occupancy: 240 Patrons OR Yo Mama"
Yo mama's so fat, when she ran away, they had to use all four sides of the
milk carton.
Yo mama's so fat, when she ran away, they had to put her picture on the
milk truck.
Yo mama's so fat, you can't even see her legs, it just looks like she's
gliding across the floor.
Yo mama's so fat, instead of Levis 501 jeans, she wears Levi's 1002's.
Yo mama's so fat, instead of wide leg jeans, she wears wide load.
Yo mama's so fat, she was in the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade... wearing
ropes.
Yo mama's so fat, when she gets in an elevator, it HAS to go down.
Yo mama's so fat, she don't wear a G-String, she wears an A, B, C, D, E, F,
G-String.
Yo mama's so fat, she fills up the bath tub, and then she turns on the
water.
Yo mama's so fat, she uses diet soap.
Yo mama's so fat, she has to use a lawn chair instead of a Thigh Master.
Yo mama's so fat, she went to sit down and the chair begged for mercy.
Yo mama's so fat, all of her clothes have to be custom made by a
contractor.
Yo mama's so fat, when I said I wanted "Pigs in a blanket" she got back in
bed.
Yo mama's so fat, when she was diagnosed with the flesh eating disease, the
doctor gave her 5 years to live.
Yo mama's so fat, she doesn't have a doctor, she has a grounds keeper.
Yo mama's so fat, she doesn't have love handles, she has a roll bar.
Yo mama's so fat, she was born with a silver shovel in her mouth.
Yo mama's so fat, she's got smaller fat women orbiting around her.
Yo mama's so fat, a picture of her fell off the wall!
Yo mama's so fat, her picture takes two frames.
Yo mama's so fat, I saw a picture of her in a magazine on page 4, 5, 6, 7,
and 8.
Yo mama's so fat, when I yell "Kool-Aid," she comes crashing through the
wall.
Yo mama's so fat, she could sell shade.
Yo mama's so fat, her cereal bowl came with a lifeguard.
Yo mama's so fat, she's larger than life.
Yo mama's so fat, she makes Big Bird look like a rubber duck.
Yo mama's so fat, when she crosses the street, cars look out for her.
Yo mama's so fat, she puts mayonaise on aspirin.
Yo mama's so fat, people jog around her for exercise.
Yo mama's so fat, I ran around her twice and got lost.
Yo mama's so fat, she's once, twice, three times a lady.
Yo mama's so fat, she gets runs in her jeans.
Yo mama's so fat, when she was walking in her jeans I swear I smelled
something burning.
Yo mama's so fat, I gotta take three steps back just to see all of her.
Yo mama's so fat, her ass has it's own congressman.
Yo mama's so fat, she shops for clothes in the local tent shop.
Yo mama's so fat, her favorite blouse is a tent.
Yo mama's so fat, she deep-fries her toothpaste.
Yo mama's so fat, her favorite food is seconds.
Yo mama's so fat, when she stepped on a train track, the warning lights
went on.
Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to the circus she sees the big top and asks
"Where can I try that on?"
Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to the circus she takes up all the rings.

Yo mama's so fat and old that when God said "Let there be Light", he told
her to move her fat ass out of the way.
Yo mama's so fat, even God couldn't raise her spirits.
Yo mama's so fat that she has TB... two bellies.
Yo mama's so fat, at the zoo, the elephants started throwing her peanuts.

Yo mama's so fat, the animals at the zoo feed her.
Yo mama's so fat, when your father mounts her, his ears pop.
Yo mama's so fat, "Place Your Ad Here" is printed on each of her butt
cheeks.
Yo mama's so fat, every time she wears high heels, she strikes oil.
Yo mama's so fat, when she plays football she plays the interior line.
Yo mama's so fat, she has to keep pesos in one pocket and yen in the other.

Yo mama's so fat, when she wears heels, they're flats by the afternoon.
Yo mama's so fat, when she leaves the beach everybody shouts "The coast is
clear."
Yo mama's so fat, she wakes up in sections.
Yo mama's so fat, her blood type is rocky-road.
Yo mama's so fat, her blood type is Ragu.
Yo mama's so fat, her college graduation picture was an aerial.
Yo mama's so fat, her yearbook picture is an aerial.
Yo mama's so fat, her driver's license says "Picture continued on other
side."
Yo mama's so fat, they used her for a trampoline at the Olympics.
Yo mama's so fat, she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagon.
Yo mama's so fat, when she put on some BVD's by the time they reached her
waist they spelled "BouleVarD."
Yo mama's so fat, when she auditioned for a part in "Indiana Jones," she
got the part as the big rolling ball.
Yo mama's so fat, she goes to a restaurant, looks at the menu, and says
"Okay."
Yo mama's so fat, when she brought her dress to the cleaners, they said
"Sorry, we don't do curtains."
Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to a restaurant, she doesn't get a menu,
she gets an estimate.
Yo mama's so fat, when I finished having sex with her and tried to roll
off, I was still on her.
Yo mama's so fat, I had to roll over twice to get off of her.
Yo mama's so fat, if she got her shoes shined, she'd have to take his word
for it!
Yo mama's so fat, she's got Amtrak tattooed on her leg.
Yo mama's so fat, when the police showed her a picture of her feet, she
couldn't identify them.
Yo mama's so fat, she freebases ham.
Yo mama's so fat, we got her in the drive-in free by dressing her as a
Chevy.
Yo mama's so fat, she went on a light diet... As soon as it's light she
starts eating.
Yo mama's so fat, she's on a new diet... slim slow.
Yo mama's so fat, she ain't on a diet, she's on a triet... She be like
"What ya'll eating? I'll try it!"
Yo mama's so fat, she went on a seafood diet... Whenever she saw food she
ate it.
Yo mama's so fat, she could go a week without eating and still not lose
weight.
Yo mama's so fat, she can't lose weight, only find it.
Yo mama's so fat, when she bends over we go into daylight savings time.
Yo mama's so fat, she's half Indian, half Irish, and half American.
Yo mama's so fat, she got it goin' on... and on and on and on.
Yo mama's so fat, when I climbed up on top of her, I burned my ass on the
lightbulb.
Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to an office, they tell her to pull up a
sofa.
Yo mama's so fat, if she wears fishnet stockings, they'd better be 50 pound
test!
Yo mama's so fat, the telephone company gave her two area codes.
Yo mama's so fat, they have to run a relay race to get her belt through her
belt loops.
Yo mama's so fat, she has to put her belt on with a boomerang.
Yo mama's so fat, her belt size is the equator.
Yo mama's so fat, she wears an asteroid belt.
Yo mama's so fat, she has her own area code.
Yo mama's so fat, her ass looks like two pigs fighting over a milk dud.
Yo mama's so fat, when she turns around, people throw her a welcome back
party.
Yo mama's so fat, when I was done I rolled over, over again, and I was
still on top of the bitch.
Yo mama's so fat, she can't even jump to a conclusion.
Yo mama's so fat, if she weighed five more pounds, she could get group
insurance!
Yo mama's so fat, when she went to the Rose Parade they thought she was a
float.
Yo mama's so fat, she went to Sizzler and got a group discount.
Yo mama's so fat, she made weight watchers go blind.
Yo mama's so fat, she wears a watch on each arm, one for each timezone.
Yo mama's so fat n black, she jumped in the ocean and they thought she was
an oil spill.
Yo mama's so fat, she has to wear a three piece bathing suit.
Yo mama's so fat, she jumped in the ocean and the ocean jumped back and
said "I'll wait my turn."
Yo mama's so fat, when she plays football she play offense and defense.
Yo mama's so fat, her nickname is "Damn."
Yo mama's so fat, the back of her neck looks like a pack of hot-dogs.
Yo mama's so fat, your daddy had to roll her in flower and look for the wet
spot.
Yo mama's so fat, she broke her leg and gravy dripped out.
Yo mama's so fat, I shot the bitch and Crisco came out.
Yo mama's so fat, she DJ's for the ice cream truck.
Yo mama's so fat, I tried to fuck her doggy style but I was just ridin'
piggy back.
Yo mama's so fat, she stepped on a talking scale and it told her to "Get
the fuck off."
Yo mama's so fat, she stepped on a talking scale and it told her "Fuck it,
they don't pay me enough!"
Yo mama's so fat, she stepped on a talking scale and it told her "Sorry, we
don't do livestock."
Yo mama's so fat, she stepped on a talking scale and it said "Please step
out of the car."
Yo mama's so fat, she stepped on a scale and she saw her phone number.
Yo mama's so fat, the last time she saw 90210 she was on a scale.
Yo mama's so fat, when she gets on the scale it says "To be continued."
Yo mama's so fat, when she steps on a scale, it says "One at a time,
please."
Yo mama's so fat, when she weighed herself the scale gave her an equation.

Yo mama' so fat, she's moving the Earth out of its orbit.
Yo mama's so fat, Yo father didn't know whether to fuck her or take the
burro ride down.
Yo mama's so fat, no one can talk behind her back.
Yo mama's so fat, I gain weight just by watching her eat.
Yo mama's so fat, when she takes a shower, her feet don't get wet.
Yo mama's so fat, she's got her own zip code.
Yo mama's so fat, she was floating in the ocean and Spain claimed her as a
new world.
Yo mama's so fat, she went to the movies and sat next to everyone.
Yo mama's so fat, she can't reach her back pocket.
Yo mama's so fat, she can't wear Dazzey Dukes. She has to wear Boss Hoggs.

Yo mama's so fat, she has to iron her pants on the driveway.
Yo mama's so fat, her tailor takes her measurements in light years.
Yo mama's so fat, when she comes down the stairs she measures on the
Richter scale.
Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to a restaurant, she even orders "Thank
You, Come Again."
Yo mama's so fat, she eats biscuits like tic tacs.
Yo mama's so fat, she don't eat Wheat Thins, she eats Wheat Thicks.
Yo mama's so fat, she fell in love and broke it.
Yo mama's so fat, when yo father fell in love with her he got lost.
Yo mama's so fat, when she swims, she leaves stretch marks on the swimming
pool.
Yo mama's so fat, when she gets out of the car, she leaves stretch marks.

Yo mama's so fat, she leaves stretch marks on the bathtub.
Yo mama's so fat, when she fills up the tub, she fills up the tub.
Yo mama's so fat, she gets clothes in three sizes: extra large, jumbo, and
oh-my-god-it's-coming-towards-us!
Yo mama's so fat, she got hit by a truck and asked "Who threw that rock?"

Yo mama's so fat, she has to pull down her pants to get into her pockets.

Yo mama's so fat, she has more nooks and crannies than a Thomas' English
Muffin.
Yo mama's so fat, she has to buy two airline tickets.
Yo mama's so fat, she eats pumpkin pies like Skittles.
Yo mama's so fat, when the cashier at KFC asked what size bucket she
wanted, she said the one on the roof.
Yo mama's so fat, she has to grease her hands to get into her pockets.
Yo mama's so fat, she has two stomachs: One for meat, one for vegetables.

Yo mama's so fat, she masturbates reading cookbooks.
Yo mama's so fat, the shadow of her ass weighs 50 pounds.
Yo mama's so fat, even her shadow has stretch marks.
Yo mama's so fat, she needs a roadmap to find her ass.
Yo mama's so fat, she fell in the Grand Canyon and got stuck.
Yo mama's so fat, she jumped up in the air and got stuck.
Yo mama's so fat, she jumped for joy and got stuck.
Yo mama's so fat, she measures 36 24 36, and the other arm is just as big.

Yo mama's so fat, the earth orbits around her instead of the sun.
Yo mama's so fat, NASA orbits satellites around her.
Yo mama's so fat, NASA is going to use her to fill the hole in the ozone
layer.
Yo mama's so fat, she plays hopscotch like this: LA, Detroit, Seattle, NY.

Yo mama's so fat, when she went to a dating service, they matched her up
with Detroit.
Yo mama's so fat, I saw her in New York, and when I told my friend in LA,
he'd seen her too.
Yo mama's so fat, after she got off the carousel, the horse limped for a
week.
Yo mama's so fat, she puts on her lipstick with a paint-roller.
Yo mama's so fat, she looks like the Stay-Puff marshmallow man on steroids.

Yo mama's so fat, she sat on the corner and the police came & said "Break
it up!"
Yo mama's so fat, she can't just work one corner, she has to work all four.

Yo mama's so fat, she sat on a dollar and made change.
Yo mama's so fat, she sat on four quarters and made a dollar.
Yo mama's so fat, her car is made out of spandex.
Yo mama's so fat, she has to get out of the car to change the radio
station.
Yo mama's so fat, she has to get out of the car to change gears.
Yo mama's so fat, she got a "speed pass" for Dairy Queen.
Yo mama's so fat, she shows up on radar.
Yo mama's so fat, she stood in front of the Hollywood sign and it just said
H d.
Yo mama's so fat, she had to roll over 4 times just to get an even tan.
Yo mama's so fat, she tried to get an all-over tan, and the sun burned out.

Yo mama's so fat, she uses hula hoops to hold up her socks.
Yo mama's so fat, she wears a hula-hoop for a belly-button ring.
Yo mama's so fat, she uses a mattress for a maxi-pad.
Yo mama's so fat, she uses a pillow case as a sock.
Yo mama's so fat, her skates went flat.
Yo mama's so fat, her belly button doesn't have lint, it has sweaters.
Yo mama's so fat, she wears a VCR for a beeper.
Yo mama's so fat, she fell off a boat and the captain yelled "Land Ho!"
Yo mama's so fat, she sat on a rowing machine and it sank.
Yo mama's so fat, she went to a Chinese Restaurant and ordered a 40oz. of
gravy.
Yo mama's so fat, she has 48 midnight snacks.
Yo mama's so fat, she's on both sides of the family.
Yo mama's so fat, she can't tie her own shoes.
Yo mama's so fat, she eats cereal out of a satellite dish.
Yo mama's so fat, she sat in Big Foot and made it a lowrider.
Yo mama's so fat, when she got on the bus she turned it into a low rider.

Yo mama's so fat, when I tried to drive around her, I ran out of gas.
Yo mama's so fat, when she walks down the street everyone yells
"Earthquake!"
Yo mama's so fat, when she walks down the street, you can hear her hips
saying to each other "If you let me by, I'll let you pass."
Yo mama's so fat, when she walks in front of the T.V., you miss 5 minutes
of your show.
Yo mama's so fat, the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is
the door.
Yo mama's so fat, the only thing she lost at Jenny Craig was $29.95.
Yo mama's so fat, Jenny Craig did a credit check.
Yo mama's so fat, when she volunteered to clean cages at the zoo, people
walked by and said "Look at the elephant!"
Yo mama's so fat, the highway patrol made her wear a "Caution! Wide Turn"
sign.
Yo mama's so fat, she sat on an Oreo and unlocked the magic.
Yo mama's so fat, they had to baptize her at Sea World.
Yo mama's so fat, last time she went to Sea World Shamu got a hard on.
Yo mama's so fat, she jumed in da ocean and the whales started singing "We
are family!"
Yo mama's so fat, when I have sex with her I have to slap her ass and ride
the wave in.
Yo mama's so fat, they changed my Physics book to say "What goes up must
come down, except Yo mama."
Yo mama's so fat, they use the elastic in her underwear for bungee jumping.

Yo mama's so fat, she bungee jumped and went straight to hell.
Yo mama's so fat, when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too.
Yo mama's so fat, she uses a kiddie slide for a shoe horn.
Yo mama's so fat, she uses blanket as a washcloth.
Yo mama's so fat, when her beeper went off, people thought she was backing
up.
Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to the beach, little kids yell "Free Willy,
Free Willy."
Yo mama's so fat, as a kid, she couldn't play Hide-n-seek, just seek.
Yo mama's so fat, she makes Free Willy look like a Tic-Tac.
Yo mama's so fat, when she backs up she beeps.
Yo mama's so fat, she plays pool with the planets.
Yo mama's so fat, she's taller lying down.
Yo mama's so fat, the body snatchers called home for backup.
Yo mama's so fat, the only thing she can fit into at the clothing store is
the dressing rooms.
Yo mama's so fat, when she fell down the stairs, she rocked herself asleep
trying to get up again.
Yo mama's so fat, she has to use sleeping bags for tube socks.
Yo mama's so fat, they had to install speed bumps at the all-u-can-eat
buffet.
Yo mama's so fat, she pulls up a chair to an all-u-can-eat buffet.
Yo mama's so fat, when it says all-u-can-eat it still ain't enough.
Yo mama's so fat, when she sits around the house, she sits AROUND the
house.
Yo mama's so fat, you can pinch an inch on her forehead.
Yo mama's so fat, you can smack it up, flip it, and rub it down all at the
same time.
Yo mama's so fat, you could go swimming in her bra.
Yo mama's so fat, when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.
Yo mama's so fat, on a scale of 1 to 10, she's a 747.
Yo mama's so fat, she has a greater gravitational attraction than a black
hole.
Yo mama's so fat, she uses the carpet as a blanket.
Yo mama's so fat, when she wears corduroy pants, the ridges don't show.
Yo mama's so fat, she made Richard Simmons cry.
Yo mama's so fat, even Richard Simmons laughs at her.
Yo mama's so fat, when she saw a yellow bus going down the road she yelled
"Hey! Stop that Twinkie."
Yo mama's so fat, when she wears a red dress people yell "Hey Kool-Aid
Man."
Yo mama's so fat, when she wears a yellow raincoat, people call her "Taxi!"

Yo mama's so fat, when she wears a yellow raincoat, kids think its the
school bus.
Yo mama's so fat, when she wears a purple sweater people call her "Barney."

Yo mama is so fat, when she sits in a chair, the rolls on her legs, cover
her feet like a blanket.
Yo mama's so fat, when she went to the beach Greenpeace tried to drag her
ass back in the water.
Yo mama's so fat, when she went to get a water bed, they put a blanket
across Lake Michigan.
Yo mama's so fat, when she sat on a rainbow, Skittle's fell out.
Yo mama's so fat, and you're so poor, when she comes in your house the
tires pop.
Yo mama's so fat, she don't know wether she's walking or rolling.
Yo mama's so fat, when she tiptoes, everyone yells "Stampede!"
Yo mama's so fat, she get's her toenails painted at Earl Schieb's.
Yo mama's so fat, but I fucked her anyway.
Yo mama's so fat, when I tried to fuck her I didn't know if I was hitting
the hole or a roll.
Yo mama's so fat, when my dog went to fuck her he had to peel too many fat
rolls and said "Fuck It."
Yo mama's so fat, when she fart the whole planet came out.
Yo mama's so fat, she makes sumo wrestlers look anerexic.
Yo mama's so fat, her car is made of spandex.
Yo mama's so fat, we're inside her right now.
Yo mama's so fat, she makes Big Bird look like a rubber duck.
Yo mama's so fat, one day when she got in a fight the person fighting her
got lost in her.
Yo mama's so fat, when she wore a shirt with an AA on it, people thought it
was American Airlines biggest jet.
Yo mama's so fat, if she were an airplane, she'd be a jumbo jet.
Yo mama's so fat, one day she was lifting up her rolls and a car fell out.

Yo mama's so fat, Dr. Martens had to kill 3 cows just to make her a pair of
shoes.
Yo mama's so fat, she can't stay on a basketball court for three seconds
without getting called for a key violation.
Yo mama so fat that she climbed Mt. Fuji with one step.
Yo mama's so fat, all the chairs in her house have seatbelts.
Yo mama's so fat, she smells like bacon at 90 degrees.
Yo mama's so fat, and her back is so crooked, when she lays down...people
say "I didn't know we had mountains."
Yo mama's so fat, when she travels, she's gotta make two trips.
Yo mama's so fat, God created her, and on tHe seventh day he rested.
Yo mama's so fat, they call her "Big Fat Ho."
Yo mama's so fat, when she was born, she gave the hospital stretch marks.

Yo mama's so fat, when she was born, she didn't get a birth certificate,
she got blue prints.
Yo mama's so big, her belly button's got an echo.
Yo mama's so big, they had to paint a stripe down her back to see if she
was walking or rolling.
Yo mama's so big, she uses a jungle gym for a walker.
Yo mama's so big, she rollerskates on busses.
Yo mama's so big, she can't wear an X jacket cause helicopters kept landing
on her back.
Yo mama's so big, she uses the interstate for a Slip `n Slide.
Yo mama's so big, she reached in her pocket and handed me a CD, a Compact
Dishwasher.
Yo mama's so big, when you climb on top of her your ears pop.
Yo mama's so big, she thought Barnum & Bailey were clothing designers.
Yo mama's so big, when she bent down to tie her shoes, her face got burnt
from re-entry.
Yo mama's so big, she whistles bass.
Yo mama's so big, she uses bowling balls for earrings.
Yo mama's so big, that they had to change "One size fit's all" to "One size
fits most"
Yo mama's so big, when she went to the airport and said she wanted to fly
they stamped Goodyear on her and sent her out to the runway.
Yo mama's so big, when I fingered her I lost a watch and two rings!
Yo mama's so big, when she goes in the water at the beach she changes the
tide.
Yo mama's so big, when she stands up the sun goes out.

Yo mama's so stupid, she spent twenty minutes lookin' at an orange juice
box because it said "concentrate".
Yo mama's so stupid, I put a Scratch-N'-Sniff sticker on the bottom of the
pool and she drowned.
Yo mama's so stupid, I asked her do tricks for me and she wagged her tail.

Yo mama's so stupid, she has 1 toe & bought a pair of flip flops
Yo mama's so stupid, she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to
makeup her mind.
Yo mama's so stupid, she asked me what yield meant. I said "Slow down" and
she said "What... does.... yield... mean?"
Yo mama's so stupid, she broke her neck at a flashing red light.
Yo mama's so stupid, she put a phone up her ass and thought she was making
a booty call.
Yo mama's so stupid, she put out the cigarette butt that was heating your
house.
Yo mama's so stupid, she put on her glasses to watch 20/20.
Yo mama's so stupid, she climbed over a glass wall to see what was behind
it.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought Grape Nuts was an STD.
Yo mama's so stupid, she climbed a chain link fence to see what was on the
other side.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got stabbed in a shoot-out.
Yo mama's so stupid, she took a knife to a drive-by shooting.
Yo mama's so stupid, she failed a survey.
Yo mama's so stupid, she stopped at a stop sign and waited for it to say
go.
Yo mama's so stupid, I told her I was reading a book by Homer and she asked
if I had anything written by Bart.
Yo mama's so stupid, she gave birth to you.
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to commit suicide by jumping off a building,
but she got lost on the way down.
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to commit suicide by jumping out of the
basement window.
Yo mama's so stupid, she needs twice as much sense to be a half-wit.
Yo mama's so stupid, she told me to meet her at the corner of "Walk" and
"Don't Walk."
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought brownie points were coupons for a bake
sale.
Yo mama's so stupid, when the computer said "Press any key to continue",
she couldn't find the 'Any' key.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought Tupac Shakur was a Jewish holiday.
Yo mama's so stupid, when I was drowning and yelled for a life saver, she
said "Cherry or grape?"
Yo mama's so stupid, she sat in a tree house because she wanted to be a
branch manager.
Yo mama's so stupid, when I told her to squeal like a pig, she said "Moo!"

Yo mama's so stupid, I saw her jumping up and down, asked what she was
doing, and she said she drank a bottle of medicine and forgot to shake it.

Yo mama's so stupid, her latest invention was a glass hammer.
Yo mama's so stupid, she saw a billboard that said "Dodge Trucks" and she
started ducking through traffic.
Yo mama's so stupid, she died from boiling water in the toaster.
Yo mama's so stupid, when she locked her keys in the car, it took her all
day to get Yo family out.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got locked out of a convertible car with the top
down.
Yo mama's so stupid, when she threw a grenade at me I pulled the pin and
threw it back.
Yo mama's so stupid, she took you to the drive-in to see "Closed for the
season."
Yo mama's so stupid, when she pulled into the drive-thru at McDonald's, she
drove through the window.
Yo mama's so stupid, she was on the corner with a sign that said "Will eat
for food."
Yo mama's so stupid, she got on an elevator and thought it was a mobile
home.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got locked in Furniture World and slept on the
floor.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got shoved in an oven and froze to death.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks fruit punch is a gay boxer.
Yo mama's so stupid, she brought a cup to the movie "Juice."
Yo mama's so stupid, she got locked in a meat locker and sweat to death.
Yo mama's so stupid, when your dad fucked her she said "Doesn't it go in my
mouth?"
Yo mama's so stupid, she leaves the house for the Home Shopping Network.
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to put M&M's in order.
Yo mama's so stupid, she peals M&M's to make chocolate chip cookies.
Yo mama's so stupid, she uses Old Spice for cooking.
Yo mama's so stupid, she threw a rock the ground and missed.
Yo mama's so stupid, her breasts are square cuz she forgot to take the
Kleenex out of the box.
Yo mama's so stupid, she sat on the TV & watched the couch.
Yo mama's so stupid, she went to the store to buy a color TV and asked what
colors they had.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought St. Ides was a Catholic church.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought St. Ides was an island in the Caribbean.

Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks sexual battery is something in a dildo.
Yo mama's so stupid, the first time she used a vibrator, she cracked her
two front teeth.
Yo mama's so stupid, she went to the Gap to get her teeth fixed.
Yo mama's so stupid, she sent me a fax with a stamp on it.
Yo mama's so stupid, I saw her walking down the street yelling into an
envelope, asked what she was doing, and she said sending a voice mail.
Yo mama's so stupid, she was on the corner giving out potato chips yellin'
"Free Lays!"
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to throw a bird off a cliff.
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to drown a fish.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought menopause was a button on the VCR.
Yo mama's so stupid, when she worked at McDonald's and someone ordered
small fries, she said "Hey Boss, all the small one's are gone."
Yo mama's so stupid, her shirt says TGIF- tits go in first.
Yo mama's so stupid, her shoes say TGIF- toes go in front.
Yo mama's so stupid, if brains were dynamite, she wouldn't have enough to
blow her nose.
Yo mama's so stupid, if brains were gas she wouldn't have enough to power a
flea-mobile around the inside of a Froot Loop.
Yo mama's so stupid, when they said they were playing craps she went and
got toilet paper.
Yo mama's so stupid, when I asked her if she wanted to play one on one, she
said "Ok, but what's the teams?"
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to melt squeeze Parkay.
Yo mama's so stupid, when she took you to the airport and a sign said
"Airport Left," she turned around and went home.
Yo mama's so stupid, she put a ruler on her pillow to see how long she
slept.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought a quarterback was a refund.
Yo mama's so stupid, I said give me a quarterback and she gave me Dan
Marino.
Yo mama's so stupid, she was locked in a grocery store and starved to
death.
Yo mama's so stupid, if you gave her a penny for her intelligence you'd get
change.
Yo mama's so stupid, she ran outside with a purse because she heard there
was change in the weather.
Yo mama's so stupid, they had to burn the school down to get her out of 3rd
grade.
Yo mama's so stupid, she couldn't tell which way an elevator was going if I
gave her two guesses.
Yo mama's so stupid, she wouldn't know up from down if she had three
guesses.
Yo mama's so stupid, when her husband lost his marbles she bought him new
ones.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks Tiger Woods is a forest.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought the internet was something you catch fish
with.
Yo mama's so stupid, she took a spoon to the Super Bowl.
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to mail a letter with food stamps.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought she could get food stamps at the post
office.
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to drown herself in a carpool.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought a lawsuit was something you wear to court.

Yo mama's so stupid, when the judge said "Order in the court," she said
"I'll have a hamburger and a Coke."
Yo mama's so stupid, she went to Burger King and thought she was a queen.

Yo mama's so stupid, she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Jif.
Yo mama's so stupid that under "Education" on her job application, she put
"Hooked on Phonics."
Yo mama's so stupid, she cooked her own complimentary breakfast.
Yo mama's so stupid, she had Dan Quayle check her spelling.
Yo mama's so stupid, when asked what a pronoun was, she said a noun that
gets paid.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got hit by a cup and told the police that she got
mugged.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks Johnny Cash is a pay toilet!
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks socialism means partying!
Yo mama's so stupid, she tripped over a cordless phone.
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to strangle herself with a cordless phone.

Yo mama's so stupid, when asked on an application, "Sex?", she marked, "M,
F, and sometimes Wednesday too."
Yo mama's so stupid, when she read on her job application to not write
below the dotted line, she put "O.K."
Yo mama's so stupid, at bottom of application where it says Sign Here - she
put Sagittarius.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought Chubby Checkers was a game for fat people.

Yo mama's so stupid, you can tell when she's used the computer because
there's White Out all over the screen.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got a part time job painting skittles.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks stereotype is the brand on her clock-radio.

Yo mama's so stupid, she can't make Jello because she can't fit 2 quarts of
water in the bix.
Yo mama's so stupid, you can make her eyes twinkle by shining light in her
ears.
Yo mama's so stupid, it takes her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes.
Yo mama's so stupid, when she went by the YMCA she said "Hey, they spelled
MACY's wrong."
Yo mama's so stupid, on her job application where it says emergency contact
she put 911.
Yo mama's so stupid, she asked for a price check at the dollar store.
Yo mama's so stupid, when she pulls up to a flashing red light it sounds
like this... Vroom, Screech, Vroom, Screech.
Yo mama's so stupid, it takes her an hour to cook minute rice.
Yo mama's so stupid, if she spoke her mind, she'd be speechless.
Yo mama's so stupid when she asked me what kinda jeans I wore, I said Guess
and she said "Ah Levis?"
Yo mama's so stupid, she jumped out the window and went up.
Yo mama's so stupid, she said "what's that letter after x" and I said Y she
said "Cause I wanna know".
Yo mama's so stupid, she took lessons for a player piano.
Yo mama's so stupid, she stands up on an empty bus.
Yo mama's so stupid, the bitch snuck on the bus and paid to get off.
Yo mama's so stupid, she studied for a blood test and failed.
Yo mama's so stupid, she died before the police arrived because she
couldn't find the "11" button in "9-1-1"
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought Boyz2Men was a daycare center.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought hamburger helper came with another person.

Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to insult you and started with "Yo
mama's..."
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought meow mix was a record for cats.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought she needed a token to get on soul train.

Yo mama's so stupid, she invented a solar powered flashlight.
Yo mama's so stupid, when I asked her about X-Men she said "Sure, there's
Harry my first baby daddy, Willy the guy I see on Thursdays..."
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought the board of education was a piece of
wood.
Yo mama's so stupid, she told everyone that she was "illegitiment" because
she couldn't read.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got hit by a parked car.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks Wu-Tang is an orange flavored drink.
Yo mama's so stupid, she sold the car for gas money.
Yo mama's so stupid, she ran out of gas leaving Texaco.
Yo mama's so stupid, her idea of safe sex is locking the car doors.
Yo mama's so stupid, she sold the house to pay the mortgage.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought Sherlock Holmes was a housing project.
Yo mama's so stupid, she went to a Clippers game to get a hair cut.
Yo mama's so stupid, she went to a Whalers game to see Shamu.
Yo mama's so stupid, when she saw a "Wrong Way" sign in her rearview
mirror, she turned around.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought asphalt was a skin disease.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought Delta Airlines was a sorority.
Yo mama's so stupid, when she saw the "NC-17 (Under 17 Not Admitted)" sign,
she went home and got 16 friends.
Yo mama's so stupid, when your dad said it was chilly outside, she ran
outside with a spoon.
Yo mama's so stupid, she married Yo daddy.
Yo mama's so stupid, she called the 7-11 to see when they closed.
Yo mama's so stupid, she gave your uncle a blowjob 'cause he said it'd help
his unemployment.
Yo mama's so stupid, when she heard 90% of all crimes occur around the
home, she moved.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got fired from a blow-job.
Yo mama's so stupid, I saw her in the frozen food section with a fishing
rod.
Yo mama's so stupid, I taught her how to do the running man and I haven't
seen the bitch since.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks a sanitary belt is drinking a shot out of a
clean glass.
Yo mama's so stupid, she put a peephole in a glass door.
Yo mama's so stupid, when someone said "Take the trash out," she moved.
Yo mama's so stupid, she used a vibrator for an egg beater.
Yo mama's so stupid, she wiped her ass before she took a shit.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks a 17 inch Admiral is a well hung sailor.
Yo mama's so stupid, she went to Dr. Dre for a pap smear.
Yo mama's so stupid, she asked you "What is the number for 911".
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to steal a free sample.
Yo mama's so stupid, I told her Christmas was just around the corner and
she went looking for it.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks Christmas Wrap is Snoop Dogg's holiday
album.
Yo mama's so stupid, she bought a video camera to record cable TV shows at
home.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks Trak Auto is where you get hair weaves for
your car.
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to drop acid but the car battery fell on her
foot.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got shot running the border after seeing a Taco
Bell commercial.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks Taco Bell is where you pay your telephone
bill.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks Taco Bell is a Mexican Phone Company.
Yo mama's so stupid, she ordered a cheese burger from McDonald's and said
"Hold the cheese."
Yo mama's so stupid, she put a quarter in a parking meter and waited for a
gumball to come out.
Yo mama's so stupid, she put on a coat to chew winterfresh gum.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got on her knees to drink her "Nehi" peach drink.

Yo mama's so stupid, she thought Thiland was a men's clothing store.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got fired from the M&M factory for throwing away
all the W's.
Yo mama's so stupid, when she went to take the 44 bus, she took the 22
twice instead.
Yo mama's so stupid, she needed a tutor to learn how to scribble.
Yo mama's so stupid, she ordered her sushi well done.
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to wake up a sleeping bag.
Yo mama's so stupid, she fell up the stairs.
Yo mama's so stupid, she went on Double Dare and when they asked her name
she said "I think I'll take the physical challenge."

Yo mama's so ugly, well.. look at you!
Yo mama's so ugly, she looks like you.
Yo mama's so ugly, she could only be Yo mama.
Yo mama's so ugly, they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower.
Yo mama's so ugly, they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies.

Yo mama's so ugly, when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no
professionals."
Yo mama's so ugly, when she looks in the mirror, the reflection ducks.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she looks in the mirror, the reflection looks back
shaking it's head.
Yo mama's so ugly, when the terminator said "I'll be back" he left running.

Yo mama's so ugly, her birth certificate was an apology letter from the
condom factory.
Yo mama's so ugly, she looks like she's been in a dryer filled with rocks.

Yo mama's so ugly, she looks like her face caught on fire and they put it
out with a fork.
Yo mama's so ugly, she looks like her face caught on fire and they put it
out with a track cleat.
Yo mama's so ugly, she's uugly. I had to add another u `cause u is ugly
too!
Yo mama's so ugly, her mom had to be drunk to breastfeed her.
Yo mama's so ugly, it looks like she's been bobbing for french fries.
Yo mama's so ugly, even the elephant man paid to see her.
Yo mama's so ugly, when your dad wants to have sex in the car, he tells her
to get out.
Yo mama's so ugly, she couldn't get laid in a prison with a handful of
pardons.
Yo mama's so ugly, her face is closed on weekends!
Yo mama's so ugly, she could scare the flies off a shit wagon.
Yo mama's so ugly, the last time I saw something that looked like her, I
pinned a tail on it.
Yo mama's so ugly, we put her in the kennel when we go on vacation.
Yo mama's so ugly, her shadow quit.
Yo mama's so ugly, her shadow ran away from her.
Yo mama's so ugly, people at the circus pay money not to see her.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she gets up, the sun goes down.
Yo mama's so ugly, she looks like she got hit with a bag of "What the
fuck?!?!"
Yo mama's so ugly, when she moved into the projects, all her neighbors
chipped in for curtains.
Yo mama's so ugly, roaches go "Hi mom!"
Yo mama's so ugly, she hurt my feelings.
Yo mama's so ugly, Rice Krispies won't talk to her.
Yo mama's so ugly, she'd scare the monster out of Loch Ness.
Yo mama's so ugly, her pillow cries at night.
Yo mama's so ugly, instead of putting the bungee cord around her ankle,
they put it around her neck.
Yo mama's so ugly, people make jokes about her.
Yo mama's so ugly, I can't even make a joke out of it.
Yo mama's so ugly, she climbed the ugly ladder and didn't miss a step.
Yo mama's so ugly, Yo daddy tosses the ugly stick and she fetches it every
time.
Yo mama's so ugly, she didn't get hit with the ugly stick, she got hit with
the ugly log.
Yo mama's so ugly, she didn't get hit with the ugly stick, she ran through
the whole damn forest.
Yo mama's so ugly, they rub tree branches on her face to make ugly sticks.

Yo mama's so ugly, bitch looks like she was hit by the whole damn ugly
tree!
Yo mama's so ugly, her mama had to tie a steak around her neck to get the
dog to play with her.
Yo mama's so ugly, she tied a pork chop around her neck and the dog still
wouldn't play with her.
Yo mama's so ugly, my dog took one look at her and ran away.
Yo mama's so ugly, she makes blind children cry.
Yo mama's so ugly, the kids call her Lassie and feed the bitch dog
biscuits.
Yo mama's so ugly, her picture is on the inside of a Roach Motel.
Yo mama's so ugly, people hang her picture in their cars so their radios
don't get stolen.
Yo mama's so ugly, I took her to a haunted house and she came out with a
job application.
Yo mama's so ugly, I took her to the zoo, guy at the door said "Thanks for
bringing her back."
Yo mama's so ugly, I took her to the zoo and the monkeys said "Damn, how'd
you get out so fast."
Yo mama's so ugly, even the tide won't come back in.
Yo mama's so ugly, even the tide won't take her out.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she went to Taco Bell they said "There's nothing
ordinary about it!"
Yo mama's so ugly, when she went camping, the park ranger was like "Hey
Yogi!"
Yo mama's so ugly, when she went to Taco Bell everyone ran for the border.

Yo mama's so ugly, people go as her for Halloween.
Yo mama's so ugly, I can fuck her in any position and its still doggy
style.
Yo mama's so ugly, she can look up a camel's butt and scare the hump off of
it.
Yo mama's so ugly, she looked out the window and the police fined her for
mooning.
Yo mama's so ugly, she has 7 years bad luck just trying to look at herself
in the mirror.
Yo mama's so ugly, she can't even bare the thought of fucking herself.
Yo mama's so ugly, I have to watch your sister undress just to calm down.

Yo mama's so ugly, if she was a flavor da bitch would be oogalicious.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she takes her bra off she looks like she has four
big toes.
Yo mama's so ugly, Medusa is jealous.
Yo mama's so ugly, it looks like she ran the 100 yard dash in a 90 yard
gym.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she cries, tears run down the back of her neck.
Yo mama's so ugly, she could be the poster child for abortion/birth
control!
Yo mama's so ugly, she uses her face for birth control.
Yo mama's so ugly, she practices birth control by leaving the lights on.
Yo mama's so ugly, the Pro-Lifers would make an exception in her case.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she got in the tub, the water jumped out.
Yo mama's so ugly, they put her face on a poster for abstinence.
Yo mama's so ugly, she has to creep up on her makeup.
Yo mama's so ugly, she has to creep up on water to get a drink.
Yo mama's so ugly, when I took her to a haunted house she came out with a
paycheck.
Yo mama's so ugly, she could scare the chrome off a bumper!
Yo mama's so ugly, she could scare the moss off a rock!
Yo mama's so ugly, she could scare Cujo off a meat truck.
Yo mama's so ugly, it looks like she got hit with a hot sack of nickels.
Yo mama's so ugly, her dentist treats her by mail-order.
Yo mama's so ugly, she has to trick or treat over the phone.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she masterbates she gets arrested for cruelty to
animals.
Yo mama's so ugly, she makes onions cry.
Yo mama's so ugly, she scares roaches away.
Yo mama's so ugly, she's never seen herself 'cause the mirrors keep
breaking.
Yo mama's so ugly, she threw a boomerang and it wouldn't even come back.
Yo mama's so ugly, that if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects.
Yo mama's so ugly, that if ugly were bricks she'd be building a highrise.

Yo mama's so ugly, that if ugly were an Olympic event, she would be the
dream team.
Yo mama's so ugly, she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween.
Yo mama's so ugly, it makes me wish birth control is retroactive.
Yo mama's so ugly, Yo father takes her to work just so he doesn't have to
kiss her good-bye.
Yo mama's so ugly, when Yo father is having sex with her he puts two bags
on her head in case one of them breaks.
Yo mama's so ugly, Yo father's breath smells like shit 'cause he'd rather
kiss her ass.
Yo mama's so ugly, just after she was born, her mama said "What a
treasure!" and her father said "Yes, let's go bury it."
Yo mama's so ugly, when she goes to the therapist, he makes her lie on the
couch face down.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she was born, they named her "Damn!"
Yo mama's so ugly, when she was born, the doctor slapped her and her
parents.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she was born the doctor smacked everyone.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she was born the doctor looked at her ass, then her
face, and said "Twins!"
Yo mama's so ugly, when she was born the doctor smacked her face.
Yo mama's so ugly, the doctor is still smacking her ass.
Yo mama's so ugly, she pretends SHE's someone else when she's having sex.

Yo mama's so ugly, even Bill Clinton wouldn't sleep with her.
Yo mama's so ugly, she got a sex change and the surgeon had to flip a coin.

Yo mama's so ugly, your real pops could only be a fuckin' dog.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she was born, the doctor smacked the wrong end.
Yo mama's so ugly, the government moved Halloween to her birthday.
Yo mama's so ugly, the last time she heard a whistle was when she got hit
by a train.
Yo mama's so ugly, the psychiatrist makes her lie face down.
Yo mama's so ugly, when two guys broke into her apartment, she yelled
"rape" and they yelled "NO!"
Yo mama's so ugly, she was a guard for Castle Greyskull.
Yo mama's so ugly, that if ugly were a crime, she'd get the electric chair.

Yo mama's so ugly, she has to get the baby drunk to breast feed it.
Yo mama's so ugly, she scared the stitches off Frankenstein.
Yo mama's so ugly, they didn't give her a costume when she tried out for
Star Wars.
Yo mama's so ugly, they know what time she was born, because her face
stopped the clock!
Yo mama's so ugly, if you looked up ugly in the dictionary her picture
would be next to it.
Yo mama's so ugly, they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints.
Yo mama's so ugly, they put her face on box of Ex-Lax and sold it empty.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she passes by a bathroom the toilet flushes.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she was lying on the beach, the cat tried to bury
her.
Yo mama's so ugly, if she was a scarecrow, the corn would run away.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she walks in the kitchen, the rats jump on the
table and start screaming.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she walks into a bank, they turn off the
surveillance cameras.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she was born she was put in an incubator with
tinted windows.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she was born, her mama saw the afterbirth and said
"Twins."
Yo mama's so ugly, she gives Freddy Kreuger nightmares.
Yo mama's so ugly, even a blind man wouldn't have sex with her.
Yo mama's so ugly, Yo dad first met her at the pound.
Yo mama's so ugly, you could stick her face in dough and make monster
cookies.
Yo mama's so ugly and fat, Greenpeace mistook her for an endangered
elephant.
Yo mama's so damn ugly and desperate, she did Winnie the Pooh and Tiger
too.
Yo mama's such an ugly bitch, she has a sign in her yard that says "Beware
of Dog."
Yo mama was such an ugly baby, her parents had to feed her with a
slingshot.
Yo mama's so ugly, she can stand on the front porch and count the chickens
in the back.
When Yo mama was born they had to take her out of the trash can cause
doctor said "Throw this shit away!"
Yo mama's so ugly, when I last saw a mouth like hers, it had a hook in it.

Yo mama's so old, I told her to act her age and the bitch died.
Yo mama's so old, she owes Fred Flintstone a food stamp.
Yo mama's so old, she used to gang bang with the Flintstone's.
Yo mama's so old, she drove a chariot to high school.
Yo mama's so old, she's got hieroglyphics on her driver's license.
Yo mama's so old, she took her drivers test on a dinosaur.
Yo mama's so old, the key on Ben Franklin's kite was to her apartment.
Yo mama's so old, she has all the apostles in her black book.
Yo mama's so old, she DJ'd at the Boston Tea Party.
Yo mama's so old, she walked into an antique store and they kept her.
Yo mama's so old, she needed a walker when Jesus was still in diapers.
Yo mama's so old, Jurassic Park brought back memories.
Yo mama's so old, her memory is in black and white.
Yo mama's so old, she has a Jesus Starter jacket.
Yo mama's so old, she used to baby-sit Yoda.
Yo mama's so old, she baby-sat for Jesus.
Yo mama's so old, her social security number is 1.
Yo mama's so old, when the police asked her for her ID, she gave them a
rock.
Yo mama's so old, her birth-certificate expired.
Yo mama's so old, her birth-certificate is in Roman numerals.
Yo mama's so old, she ran track with dinosaurs.
Yo mama's so old, she has a picture of Jesus in her yearbook.
Yo mama's so old, she was a waitress at the last supper.
Yo mama's so old, she has a picture of Moses in her yearbook.
Yo mama's so old, she knew the Beetles when they were the New Kids on the
Block.
Yo mama's so old, she knew Mr. Clean when he had an afro.
Yo mama's so old, she owes Jesus a nickel.
Yo mama's so old, she owes Moses a quarter.
Yo mama's so old, she's got Jesus' beeper number.
Yo mama's so old, when she was in school there was no history class.
Yo mama's so old, when God said "Let there be light" she was there to flick
the switch.
Yo mama's so old, when Moses split the red sea, she was on the other side
fishing.
Yo mama's so old, when she reads the bible she reminisces.
Yo mama's so old, she's mentioned in the shout out at the end of the bible.

Yo mama's so old, she planted the first tree at Central Park.
Yo mama's so old, her birthday expired.
Yo mama's so old, she has Adam & Eve's autographs.
Yo mama's so old, she got slapped by Eve for blowing Adam.
Yo mama's so old, she took friendship pictures with Adam & Eve.
Yo mama's so old, she co-wrote the Ten Commandments.
Yo mama's so old, she got the first copy of the Ten Commandments.
Yo mama's so old, she has an autographed bible.
Yo mama's so old, the candles cost more than the birthday cake.
Yo mama's so old, she farts out mummy dust.
Yo mama's so old, she squirts powdered milk out her nipples.
Yo mama's so old, she sat next to Jesus in third grade.
Yo mama's so old, she knew Burger King while he was still a prince.
Yo mama's so old, she knew Cap'n Crunch while he was still a private.
Yo mama's so old & ugly, her name is Ape.
Yo mama's so old, when she was young rainbows were black and white.
Yo mama's so old, she called the cops when David and Goliath started to
fight.
Yo mama's so old and fat that when God said "Let there be Light", he told
her to move her fat ass out of the way.
Yo mama's so old, she watches PBS.
Yo mama's so old, she used to baby-sit Jesus.
Yo mama's so old, she's got a pair of Air Moses sneakers.
Yo mama's so old, when she was born, the Dead Sea was just getting sick.
Yo mama's so old, when I slapped her on the back her tits fell off.

Yo mama has one arm and swims in circles.
Yo mama has one leg and swims in circles.
Yo mama has one arm and when she fights, the announcer says "She throws a
right, a right, and another right."
Yo mama has so many fat rolls that she has to screw her pants on.
Yo mama has 10 fingers - all on the same hand.
Yo mama has 3 eyes and they call her "Eye-eye-eye."
Yo mama has 4 eyes and 2 pair of sunglasses.
Yo mama's has wooden tits and breast feeds beavers.
Yo mama has a `fro with landing lights.
Yo mama has a short leg and walks in circles.
Yo mama has a moustache and they call her Bob.
Yo mama has a wooden afro with an "X" carved in the back.
Yo mama has green hair and thinks she's a tree.
Yo mama has no legs, no arms, and no eyes but she's still the one for me.

Yo mama has no arms and bought a vest.
Yo mama has one tooth and they call her Drill-Bit.
Yo mama has one tooth and they call her Chopper One.
Yo mama has one ear and a burnt potato chip.
Yo mama has so much wax in her ears, I stuck a Q-Tip in and pulled out a
Sugar Daddy.
Yo mama has one ear and has to take off her hat to hear what you're saying.

Yo mama has one hand and a Clapper.
Yo mama has one leg and a bicycle.
Yo mama has one short arm and can't applaud.
Yo mama has so much hair on her upper lip, she braids it.
Yo mama has so much hair on her chest, her tits look like coconuts.
Yo mama has so much dandruff, a fly landed on her head and said "Damn, I
haven't seen this much snow in years."

Yo mama's teeth are so crooked, when she smiles her mouth looks like its
throwin' up gang signs.
Yo mama's teeth are so rotten, when she smiles they look like dice.
Yo mama's got one tooth and people call her chomper.
Yo mama's teeth are so crooked, when she smiles it looks like her tongue is
in jail.
Yo mama's teeth are so crooked, she needs a map to find her tongue.
Yo mama's teeth are so crooked, she uses them to cut chain at the hardware
store.
Yo mama's gold tooth is so fake, her whole mouth turned green.
Yo mama's got two gold teeth, one says 24k and the other says "Believe that
shit if you want to."
Yo mama's teeth look like Honey Smacks.
Yo mama's teeth are so ugly, she got pulled over for not having dental
insurance.
When I looked at Yo mama's teeth, I didn't know whether to smile or to kick
a field goal.
Yo mama's teeth are so black, it looks like she's been eatin' coal.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, she has to brush them with a butter knife.

Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, I can't believe it's not butter.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, she can butter a whole loaf of bread.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, she slows down traffic when she smiles.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, when she drinks water it turns into
lemonade.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, she looks like she got a job taste testing
butter scotch.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, when God said "Let there be light", he told
her to smile.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, when she closes her mouth her eyes light up.

Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, when she walked into a church, everybody
said "I see the light!"
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, crows fly down and pick at them like it was
corn.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, Dorothy and Toto thought it was the Yellow
Brick Road.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, when she smiled, Dorothy made it to OZ.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, she spits butter.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, she looks like a cheeseburger.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, she's got more gold than Fort Knox.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, you'd think she's been blowin' the Simpsons.

Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, she looks like she's got a Twinkie in her
mouth.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, when she smiles it looks like a Kraft
Singles pack.
Yo mama's teeth are so nasty, they make Yuck Mouth afraid of the cavity
creeps.
Yo mama's teeth are so big, when she sneezed she bit a hole in her chest.

Yo mama's teeth are so big, her dentist charges her by the tooth.
Yo mama's teeth are so big, it looks like her mom had an affair with Mr.
Ed.
Yo mama's teeth are so big, I thought they were piano keys.
Yo mama's missing so many teeth, you can play checkers on her mouth.
Yo mama's so toothless, it took her an hour to eat minute rice.
Yo mama's so toothless, when she couldn't eat an apple, she just gummed it
to death.
Yo mama's got snakeskin teeth.
Yo mama's got shark teeth.
Yo mama's got one tooth in front and one in the back talkin' `bout "Give me
a bite."
Yo mama's got so many gaps in her teeth it looks like piano keys.
Yo mama's teeth are so big and gapped, I could run hurdles with them.
Yo mama's teeth are so gapped, bitch has to floss with a garden hose.
Yo mama's teeth are so gapped, her front tooth says "Next tooth one mile."

Yo mama's teeth are so crooked, she has to suck my dick sideways.
Yo mama's got so many teeth missing, it looks like her tongue is in jail.

Yo mama's got three teeth... one in her mouth and two in her pocket.
Yo mama's got summer teeth... summer in her mouth and summer in her pocket.

Yo mama's so black, every time she gets in a car the oil light comes on.
Yo mama's so black, if she sat in a Jacuzzi the water would turn into
coffee.
Yo mama's so black, she bleeds smoke.
Yo mama's so black, she could show up naked to a funeral.
Yo mama's so black, when she puts on yellow lipstick, she looks like a
cheese burger.
Yo mama's so black, she drinks water and pees coffee.




Previous: Your momma so fat
Next: Dentist Jokes 5